Can you really delete yourself?


Unpublic Be Seen. Not Found.
Myth Buster Common advice that's wrong (or incomplete)

Can you really delete You?

Your data broker removal service probably did its job - it was just never the whole job


You probably pay for a data broker removal service (like DeleteMe, Incognito or Optery... hopefully not OneRep). And it works. It scrubs your data off those broker sites and, as long as you keep the service running, they stay scrubbed. So, money well spent.

But what if someone grabbed your email address off your contact page (just the email)? About two minutes later, they've probably got your real name, two user names you forgot you ever used, the city you live in, and your home address. None of it came from a data broker. Your removal service did the job you hired it to do perfectly.
​
But... it was never actually the only way to your front door.

01 What you've heard

"I'm not worried... I've got deleteme"

Credit where it's due... these services work. A good removal service finds your listing across the people search sites and gets them taken down, and then keeps watching so they stay down. So, if you're worried about a stranger getting your home address off one of these sites, that door does genuinely close when you turn on one of these removal services (or just do your opt outs yourself). So, I'm not telling you to turn off your service.

The problem is that it just closes that one door. Being off these sites doesn't mean that you're not findable.

The pattern we keep seeing
No single tool protects you because no one tool covers everything. There are lots of ways for someone to get to you and each one needs it's own layer of protection. Stack enough of them and you become genuinely hard to reach. Rely on just one and you don't have enough protection - you have a single point of failure that you've mistaken for a finish line.
02 Why it's wrong

One layer, Many doors

Data brokers don't own your info... they just scrape and repackage it to make it easier to sell (that's how they make their money... selling your data). So, getting your info off their sites is real, worthwhile work. But the problem is that it doesn't address the root cause. The actual sources of data (things like public records, email lookup tools, your DoorDash history) are still out there, just waiting to be scraped again.

The reason that you have to pay for a continual service is that, without it, you submit a removal, they take it down, and then the next time they scrape the source data, it's right back up on the sites again. It's like playing whack-a-mole (or whack-a-broker, I guess).

Your email is a skeleton key. You can hand it to any free lookup tool and it can cross-reference breach dumps, old signups, and public profiles to rebuild your name, usernames, photo, city. The brokers aren't in the loop on this one - it's mostly running on data that got leaked years ago and doesn't just disappear. You might get a clean removal report from your removal service... but it's not touching any of these other data sources.

Your public records are the root source. Your address lives in your county property records, voter registration and court filings - and it's really easy to search most places (no data broker required). The data broker was just a convenient way to get to this info. Remove the convenience and the source is still a public, searchable record, independent of any broker listing.

These are all different doors, with different keys. The removal service guards one door pretty well, but only that one. That's not a knock on the tool, it's just the reason that a single tool is never the answer.

03 What actually works

Stack the layers

Each door needs a different layer of protection (a different key). But each layer of protection should address a different gap in your protection.

The removal services cover the data broker gap. But you need more than that to become unfindable.

The key is to start adding other layers to your stack that protect against someone coming in another door. Here are a few places to start:

  • Break the link between your email and your name. Consider using a dedicated alias for anything public facing (bookings, business, signups) - that isn't your legal name and isn't wired to any personal accounts. Same with emails - use unique emails for each account and they become a whole lot less valuable. That's a (pretty HUGE) second layer and it can turn that skeleton key into scrap metal.
  • Close the source on public records (if you can) - Opt out of your state's voter file disclosure (if you live in a state where you're allowed), get your name off property records (with a trust or an LLC if you own or a redaction request if you rent). What kind of redaction you have access to here is really dependent on where you live, so implement this if you can... and if you can't that layer above should be your go-to. And... as always, if you're headed down the path with something like a trust, consult a lawyer about the right setup for you.

We've got three separate layers that address three separate gaps and none of them are enough along.

  • Creating an alias means that the legal name they're looking for in public records isn't you
  • Deleting public records (where you can) means that if they DO have your legal name, you don't show up there (and as an added bonus this makes the data broker listings easier to keep down)
  • Data broker removal gets anything that sneaks through the first two layers.

That's basically the whole idea. Protection isn't really a thing you can buy, it's layers you stack one over the other, one for each way in. And it keeps going as you add coverage in other areas of your life someone could come at. Even these three layers here aren't enough, they're just a pretty decent start.

Your move · This week
Run your own email through a lookup tool
Take the email from your public facing stuff and run it through a free email lookup tool (that's what anyone who's curious about you could do). See what comes back (and don't freak out too much - remember that it's solvable).
On the Radar
What we're watching
01 Substack scores your posts for AI writing now. If you're on Substack, you have a new "helpful feature" to contend with.
02 Facebook offers a selfie-verified badge. Great for impersonation defense... not so great for keeping your biometric data away from Meta.
03 Meta might accuse you of stealing your own content. Impersonators are convincing Meta that your content is theirs.
From Unpublic HQ
Pre-Order Shadow
Shadow is the system we run with our one-on-one clients, rebuilt so you can run it yourself.

It's personalized to you, your content, your platform and your location and walks you step-by-step through locking down your public information so that you can be seen by millions, but found by no one.

It's the program that walks you through building the extra layers you need on top of a data broker removal service.
Pre-Order Shadow →
Stay safe,
Susan @ Unpublic
unpublic
You're getting this because you signed up at unpublic.co.
Unpublic, PBC.  ·  600 1st Ave Ste 330 PMB 92768  ·  Seattle, WA 98104-2246

Unpublic

Practical privacy strategies, stories from creators who've been there and behind-the-scenes breakdowns of how exposure happens.

Read more from Unpublic

Be Seen. Not Found. Field Report Real-world creator incident One text to hack everything How one DM turned into a stolen account, scammed friends, and a ransom note 01 What happened What's Your Number? "Can you do me a favor? What's your number?" It was a quick Instagram DM from a friend. Totally normal because friends ask for your number all the time... so she sent it. Except it wasn't her friend. It was a hacker who was already inside her friend's account. And now, he was inside hers...

Be Seen. Not Found. Field Report Real-world creator incident Is Meta's AI Doxxing YOU? Is it the AI? Or just what's already out there? 01 What happened Meta's AI Doxxed A Creator The creator world (and general media too) was all abuzz this week with this video from mom/travel creator @kontheinside. She was a small travel and parenting creator (about 400 followers before she posted the video) who posted a video of her and her child singing in the car. That's her normal type of content, so she...

Be Seen. Not Found. How they find you A specific exposure area, walked through step by step Your face is searchable Face → Name → Home... they're all just links in a chain 01 What happened Your Face to Your Home In the fall of 2024, two Harvard students walked around with a pair of Meta glasses and managed to identify dozens of strangers in real time. Not just their names, but their home addresses, their family members, their phone numbers. The people they were looking at had no idea it was...